Monday, 1/10/22

 Today was a bit difficult.  I started having sciatic type pain down the left leg from the pelvis yesterday and it got worse.  I only woke up a couple of time during the night, but at 9am, I took more meds and went back to sleep. I think a lymph node is impinging on a nerve and so yeah, = sciatic type pain.

Hospice nurse came today and we'll reevaluate pain control. 

My family leaves me speechless at times.  I'm blessed.

I'm good emotionally, I just have an intense sense of urgency to get vital things done.  What have I been NOT doing over the last 8 years?!  Seriously, most is addressed but there are still a few.

The outpouring of love is a wonderful salve and source of comfort,  I don't care how you oray or send good thoughts, they're welcome in any form

Sleep well sweet friends

Perspective

This is what my oncologist told me as far as longevity in July 2014.

More to come in a later post about my Come to Jesus meeting with my oncologist yesterday.  But he did provide some eye opening stats on Median Life Expectancy for men with Stage IV, metastasized (to a major organ i.e. lungs), aggressive, Gleason 8 prostate cancer.  They are as follows:

No Treatment – 12-18 months

Hormone

Therapy only – 32 months

 

HT and chemo – 49 months

 

This is why I’ve agreed to chemotherapy starting July 28, 2014.

 I'd say I beat the odds rather well.

Status Update

 I am now formally on hospice care.  We're working toward good pain control and I don't really have to leave the house, so this is helpful.

In addition to the severe, chemo induced peripheral pain, I now have pain in my torso, which would make sense with mets to liver, lungs, and lymph nodes, both upper and pelvic.  That's to say that the pain has moved into a new level.

My energy is still slim to none and standing for long periods is out of the question.  I've also resigned myself to probably needing a wheel chair for outings as I can be very unsteady on my feet.  There will be no ladder climbing in my future.

Emotionally I'm well all things considered.  I'm enjoying life despite all that has come and will come my way and have been warmed by an outpouring of love and assistance from my nearby relatives.  Talk about stepping up to the plate.

I've put in process California's Death with Dignity Act and made the appropriate legal requests.  I won't fight this to the bitter end with every possible treatment the medical establishment has to offer.  I've seen it up close too many times and it's brutal and flat out ugly.  I like options and Cali offers this as one.  By the end of the month, I should have that option, and I'm relieved by that.

My energy is only available if I've taken a prescribed stimulant and even then, that's a temporary, artificial run for a few hours.  Talking on the phone can be wearisome as can writing a message like this.  So I've been out of touch and largely off Facebook.

Going forward I'll try to keep the blog updated for those who wish to keep track of my status.  One reason I started the blog almost 8 years ago was so friends/family would have a central place to go for Status Updates.  The blog turned into much more over the years with 43,000+ views, and numerous emails from men around the world seeking advice.

But at this point, I'm turning it back into a source for my current status so I encourage those of you who wonder how I'm doing and have a computer to please bookmark this page and I in turn will try to keep it updated.  Sometimes I might be up for a phone call and would enjoy it.  What I can't do is repeat the details of my current state several times a day.

Please help me accomplish this.  Much love.