Monday, March 31, 2014

Houston All Set Up, Now Just Another Week of Waiting

So appointments with the recommended oncologist (including a full days for or blood work, CT scans, bones scans and a scan or two I have have forgotten) as well as the MD Anderson appointment are set.  Derrell will ride over with me and, as usual, be my rock.  I love this human being with all my heart and am humbled at how lucky I am to have him walk through my door 2 years and 10 months ago.

I still find myself bursting into tears at odd times (using the restroom, stopped at a stop light, etc.).  Normal I guess.  I also find myself achey and fatigued most of the days recently.  Not just "The 9 hours sleep I got wasn't enough" tired but just flat out fatigued.  This shit scares me.  My reading is that with metastasized PC, the average life expectancy with good treatment, good diet,etc is 5-10 years.  I'd hope for far more than 62 and with good quality.

One day at a time.

3 comments:

  1. Scott,
    Thank goodness you have Derrell with you. I cannot imagine going through what you're going through alone. Words really fail me at a time like this. All I can say is that my thoughts are with you. I know that doesn't help your situation but know that someone cares.
    Ron

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  2. Ron:
    I am indeed a fortunate guy. Derrell, despite his own fears over all this, has been a rock for me. On top of all that he's a nurse tech so was tremendously helpful during my 3 week/3 biopsy ordeal. On top of all that, he's just the sweetest, most loving person I've ever known and I'm confident and bolstered by the fact that he'll be with me wherever this ordeal leads.

    I'm also fortunate in friends, family and people that I don't even know (like yourself) who have been so kind and supportive.

    Was I unlucky to get an aggressive cancer? Yes. Am I lucky to be Scott and have the people in my life that I do. Very.

    I appreciate you.

    Scott

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    Replies
    1. Scott,
      When I found out you had an aggressive cancer, I was shocked. By your initial entries to Inspire, I had assumed that you were just going for a routine biopsy which, considering what you're going through now, doesn't even compare. For someone as normally verbose as I am, I have difficulty in finding the words to comfort you. All I can say is what I would do in your situation, take one thing at a time, cherish and appreciate the support you receive from your loved ones and treasure each day. For myself, I was sure I wouldn't make it past 60 years old. In fact a good friend of mine and I used to joke about it. Every day over 60 was "gravy." Now that I'm 72 I know I am very, very fortunate to still have my health, such as it is even though I have seed implants, make regular visits to my dermatologist to have more skin and flesh cut off of me in staving off skin cancer, and an irregular heartbeat. My good friend? He's gone now, in that he has Parkinson's and dementia. He is now in a total care facility, and doesn't know anyone. A cruel irony in that we used to joke about never ending up in a nursing home. I still say that. But you never know. Thankfully he too has a long time partner, now spouse (Jim) who sees him everyday and makes sure he's well taken care of. In the end that's all we can hope for, to have someone who cares for us with us. Always in my thoughts Scott.
      Ron

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