So they poked umpteen holes in my P yesterday and the way the get there is via the rectum. I don't remember any of this as the kind medical professionals drugged me into oblivion. I was told to expect blood in my urine which there was although it has decreased quickly.
What no one mentioned was that perhaps when I had that First of the Morning My Partner Has Left the House So I Can Safely Get a Bit Flatulent Without Bothering Anyone moment, I should have done so on the throne as opposed to while standing in my nice white W Hotel robe on the white tile downstairs. Reminded me of a Scorsese movie or what it might be like for a young woman on her first period. At least it was tile and not carpet.